You may have noticed that I missed Saturday's post and now it's Wednesday and I'm posting for yesterday. Well, this is because I've recently felt like I am running out of things to say to you folks - only now am I realizing that I feel like I am running out of things that are good enough to say to you.
When I started this blog, it was a place for me to tell a bunch of strangers (or nobody at all) who I am and what my feelings and thoughts are. It was a place for me to be my absolute self, regardless of what anyone else thinks. Lately, I have found myself trying to impress readers that I'm not even 100% sure exist, and I think it's time to take a look back at myself and realize that this blog is my space, it is a part of me, and I can share whatever I want to. If you don't like some parts of me, that's fine. If you do like some even better. But I need to stop filtering myself and only showing the bits of me that I think are "good enough" for a bunch of people that I don't even know and probably aren't even reading.
So, to those of you who wish to continue reading my blog and who like even some of my previous posts: I thank you. I appreciate you taking the time to verify my existence by reading a little bit into my life two times a week.
I am also going to try to be a little more punctual with my posts. We'll see how that goes, because Tuesdays and Saturdays tend to be pretty busy for me. Maybe I'll have to change the days I publish. But I'll get that all figured out later.
Anyways, I just wanted to let you guys know that things are going to be back in order soon. Thank you again for reading <3
Wednesday, July 24, 2013
Thursday, July 18, 2013
On Being Independent
Hello internet. I am turning 19 in 12 days, and yesterday, I finally got my driver's license. Woohoo.
I am generally a very independent person. I like grocery shopping and having a job and paying for my own things. I don't like depending on anyone else for anything. But somehow I waited about two and a half years to get my license. I don't know why, maybe there is some psychological meaning buried deep in this brain of mine, but I haven't found it. I don't much care to, either.
Regardless, I wanted to celebrate this bit of independence earned with you folks by sharing with you a bit of my life and the reasons behind why I like being independent.
I think the main reason behind my not wanting to depend on anyone else is that I have seen a lot of heartbreak and empty promises and tears in my life. I grew up too fast because the people around me depended on others, and I swore to never be like that. I have seen people suffer at the hands of people they had loved, and I decided that I never wanted to be so vulnerable.
The other reason would be that for a lot of my life, I have tried to impress everyone around me. People that I don't even like, sometimes. But if I can go shopping on my own or work to earn my own money, then that makes me a real person, and that's something that I need to know. I am a real person and I have real worth.
But, as much as I love independence, I never seem to be very independent. As I said, for the longest time I had no license. I often depend on the people around me, especially my boyfriend. I think I'm beginning to be okay with that though. I think to live as people we need to know that we have limits and not everything can be done on our own. I am lucky enough to have people that I trust around me, that I can depend on without much damage to my precious ego. Dylan, especially, supports me enough that I feel like not only are we growing as a pair, but I am also growing as a person, and I deeply appreciate that.
Maybe independence is not about doing everything on your own. Maybe it is more about knowing when you do need help and support, and being able to swallow your pride and ask for it. Maybe it's about choosing the right people to ask.
PS - Sorry I'm late again! But I'm pretty sure being independent means I can post whenever I please... xo <3
I am generally a very independent person. I like grocery shopping and having a job and paying for my own things. I don't like depending on anyone else for anything. But somehow I waited about two and a half years to get my license. I don't know why, maybe there is some psychological meaning buried deep in this brain of mine, but I haven't found it. I don't much care to, either.
Regardless, I wanted to celebrate this bit of independence earned with you folks by sharing with you a bit of my life and the reasons behind why I like being independent.
I think the main reason behind my not wanting to depend on anyone else is that I have seen a lot of heartbreak and empty promises and tears in my life. I grew up too fast because the people around me depended on others, and I swore to never be like that. I have seen people suffer at the hands of people they had loved, and I decided that I never wanted to be so vulnerable.
The other reason would be that for a lot of my life, I have tried to impress everyone around me. People that I don't even like, sometimes. But if I can go shopping on my own or work to earn my own money, then that makes me a real person, and that's something that I need to know. I am a real person and I have real worth.
But, as much as I love independence, I never seem to be very independent. As I said, for the longest time I had no license. I often depend on the people around me, especially my boyfriend. I think I'm beginning to be okay with that though. I think to live as people we need to know that we have limits and not everything can be done on our own. I am lucky enough to have people that I trust around me, that I can depend on without much damage to my precious ego. Dylan, especially, supports me enough that I feel like not only are we growing as a pair, but I am also growing as a person, and I deeply appreciate that.
Maybe independence is not about doing everything on your own. Maybe it is more about knowing when you do need help and support, and being able to swallow your pride and ask for it. Maybe it's about choosing the right people to ask.
PS - Sorry I'm late again! But I'm pretty sure being independent means I can post whenever I please... xo <3
Saturday, July 13, 2013
On Being Positive
I know I post about positivity and happiness all the time, and I can't say that this post is going to be entirely different, so feel free to skip this one, folks.
I am writing about positivity right now because I have been an incredibly happy person lately, and I wanted to share the different things that make me so happy with you.
First off, the right people. As you guys know, I have this wonderful guy in my life, Dylan. He is supportive and he motivates me and keeps me thinking straight. I'm not saying you need to have a significant other to be happy - I'm just saying that it helps to surround yourself with happy people who are going to build you up rather than put you down.
Secondly, the right attitude. It sounds totally cliche and whatever, but if you have a positive outlook on everything, you can turn nearly anything into a positive situation. This sounds like something that just everyone says, but I've found it to be true. Plus, if everyone is saying it, it stands to reason there might be some truth behind it!
Finally, self-respect and self-confidence. That thing I said about being around people who will build you up? There's no one you're around more than yourself, so you have to be one of those people too. Start believing you can do things - you just might surprise yourself.
So there you have it, my tips to being a more positive, happy person. I hope you get at least something from this!
Oh, and keep smiling!
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
On a New Me
I am not an abnormally lazy person. There isn't a lot of active stuff that I really enjoy doing, but I'm not really lazy. Even the active things I do enjoy, I've never put a whole lot of extra effort into. Like when I played hockey (bring on the Canadian stereotypes), I went to practices and games and I tried hard there, but I never really put extra effort in outside the rink.
Earlier this year, I started running. Nothing organized, and nothing really strict, I just ran along my road three or four times a week. Somewhere along the way, I stopped running, and I wish I hadn't. I am learning to like the active lifestyle, so I decided to start with a clean slate.
Yesterday, I decided to start running again. The past couple of days, I've been doing yoga. Today, I am facing a fear of mine... I am joining a gym. That means I am going to be feeling vulnerable and doing something that's still a little out of my comfort zone (working out), not in the comfort of my own home, but in a gym. Where there are other people.
But, maybe it won't be so bad. If I am going to turn myself into an active person, maybe I can make some other changes for the better along the way. Maybe I can become a person who isn't so shy and awkward around every single person I don't know.
Maybe this first step will be the start of a whole new me.
Earlier this year, I started running. Nothing organized, and nothing really strict, I just ran along my road three or four times a week. Somewhere along the way, I stopped running, and I wish I hadn't. I am learning to like the active lifestyle, so I decided to start with a clean slate.
Yesterday, I decided to start running again. The past couple of days, I've been doing yoga. Today, I am facing a fear of mine... I am joining a gym. That means I am going to be feeling vulnerable and doing something that's still a little out of my comfort zone (working out), not in the comfort of my own home, but in a gym. Where there are other people.
But, maybe it won't be so bad. If I am going to turn myself into an active person, maybe I can make some other changes for the better along the way. Maybe I can become a person who isn't so shy and awkward around every single person I don't know.
Maybe this first step will be the start of a whole new me.
Sunday, July 7, 2013
On My Talents
The other day, I was thinking about how fun it would be to create a bogus resume with all these talents and special skills that would never actually help to get a job.
I have decided to share some of my bogus resume special skills with you lucky folks. You're welcome.
1. Paying attention to everything except the thing I should most be paying attention to. For example, I'm currently at work. There is someone pumping gas and I am updating my blog ON TIME FOR ONCE.
2. Procrastinating things to the point of people believing I'll never do them and then surprising people by actually getting them done! If you're a frequent reader you don't need an example of this because my blog is example enough.
3. Making a really big deal of things that aren't really a big deal, e.g. getting a haircut, deciding what to wear, picking a colour to paint my nails, etc.
4. Going on a health kick for a maximum of two weeks at a time. As a bonus, for the time between health kicks I am really good at eating constantly!
5. Finally, I am really good at loving people and being loyal. Sounds cheesy but seriously, I don't even throw my old stuffed animals out so imagine how good I am to my friends/family/boyfriend!
There you have it, my special skills. Maybe sometime I'll do my weird hobbies, or things I suck at.
In the meantime, what are your special skills? Let me know in the comments or on twitter: @amyleighallain
Wednesday, July 3, 2013
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)