On Complexity and Life Lessons

Yesterday I was going through the notes on my iPod and I found this blog post that I started writing on the train three months ago. I had totally forgotten about it, and it's a little scatter-brained and hard to follow, but I thought it was worth posting.

I have recently decided that I am a more complex individual than I had originally believed. I always thought myself to be a pretty simple person. I knew my likes and dislikes, for the most part - at least, as much as someone with only 19 years of life can - and I was pretty much happy with that.

But things have changed.

I'm 19 years old and I moved from Canada to the Netherlands 7 months ago for school - without my family, without my boyfriend, and with only 4 of my friends. I guess an experience like that can change a person, especially someone fresh out of her mother's house.

Now, I feel like I belong in Europe. I'm young and free and I've got more friends from more different places than I would have ever imagined, being the socially  awkward, shy introvert that I am. But that's not all that's changed. I've gone from being the girl who's always had a boyfriend to being a girl who can't imagine feeling ready to settle down. I'm not the avid planner anymore, I almost prefer spontaneity now. Most importantly, I've realized that it's okay to not always be the girl who's got it together. Sometimes, you don't have everything figured out, and you make mistakes, and that's just life. I'm learning to roll with it, because I know if I don't I'm going to have a real hard time being happy.

I guess that's the "life lesson for the day:" I'd rather take a blind leap into something that's going to make me happy than settle for planning out every step of something that's merely adequate.